Melissa-Alkali

Alkali Hot Springs 11 28 12

So Melissa and I were gonna go to Ringbolt Hot Springs for the night and then head back to Los Angeles, but we got stung by the adventure stinkbug and chose to head up the 95 to Alkali Hot Spring near Goldfield, NV. We got in at night but the moon was full so we could see pretty well without headlamps. We dropped trou, stepped in the tub and cracked a beer. We noticed there was a Magnum condom wrapper on the ground along with a bunch of other trash, then a few minutes later we saw the condom in the grass. Who the fuck wears condoms? Like seriously, if you are the type of person to pump outdoors are you really that concerned about std’s and children? Maybe if you are some gay bear pounding some random dude at the hot spring then yeah wear a condom, but there was no poo on this condom so I assume it was used specifically for intravaginal lovemaking. Just pull out bro and blast on the ground, that way it will dry up before the next person gets there and they don’t have to see your gross dong-wrap.

So we soaked for a few hours and then pitched our tent next to the car and fell asleep. We woke up pretty early to soak again before we headed out to our next destination. We cleaned up the place and dumped our trash in the can by the parking lot. Apparently this place is owned by some dude and he gets hella bummed cuz niggaz be trashin’ the place. Hopefully we prevented him from getting another hernia. My little advice to that dude, DON’T OWN A HOT SPRING, unless you want to deal with drug users, homeless people and public sex on the nightly. Seriously, it’s like you’re a fucking prison warden, you gotta put up with the worst people ever and you ain’t even getting paid.

Directions: From Goldfield Nevada drive 4 miles north on the 95 and go left on Silver Peak Road. After 6.8 miles you will see an abandoned power station on the left and a giant parking lot with a tree and trashcans in the middle. Park here and walk up toward the old building to the hot spring on the west side. De-clothe, crack open a brew-dog and clean up your fucking condoms!

 

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